Postcards From The Edge Of Realspace

Via hakaseheart:

TUMBLR ACCENT CHALLENGE

What is your name/username?
Where are you from?
Pronounce the following words: Aunt, Roof, Route, Theater, Iron, Salmon, Caramel, Fire, Water, New Orleans, Pecan, Both, Again, Probably, Alabama, Lawyer, Coupon, Mayonnaise, Pajamas, Caught, Naturally, Aluminium, GIF, Tumblr, Crackerjack, Doorknob, Envelope, GPOY, Polka Dots, Tumblr, Papaya, Penthouse, Subtext, Smile
What is it called when you throw toilet paper on a house?
What is a bubbly carbonated drink called?
What do you call your grandparents?
What do you call the wheeled contraption in which you carry groceries at the supermarket?
What’s the bug, that when you touch it, it curls into a ball?
What do you say to address a group of people?
What do you call the kind of spider that has an oval-shaped body and extremely long legs?
Choose a book and read a passage from it.
Be a wizard or a vampire?
How old are you?
Is it cold where you are?
What is your favorite color?
What color are your eyes?
Do you have freckles? 
When is your birthday?
What was the last thing you drank?
Do you know anyone on Tumblr in real life? If so, who?
Would you rather: Have a million dollars or a million friends? Eat a taco or a quesadilla? Be a shark or an elephant? 
Do you speak a second language? Say something in it.
Do you think you have an accent?
End the audio post by saying any THREE words you want.